Marie was working the day shift at the pub when Thomas, his aunt and Felicia appeared.
"Hey! What are you guys doin??" Marie cheerfully greeted.
"Aw...it's all good girl; we just came by for some lunch," Thomas answered.
Thomas had been spending time on the town with his family. During the process, he reflected as much as he reconnected with family. An exercise in soul searching and fence mending, something which was in order and long overdue, as Chris had suggested.
Perhaps the police standoff had been a wake up call for Thomas; he was even more determined to get his life in order and this little family outing was a small, but promising, start.
Thomas’ aunt and Felicia went to the restroom as Marie returned to the table with their drinks. She collapsed into a chair across from him with a groan.
"I watched the thing on TV, I was terrified Thomas," Marie began.
"Yeah, me too," he sighed. "I cant believe I let things get this way; it almost cost me everything…my little girl," Thomas shamefully confessed, looking up at Marie.
"Are you okay?" Marie asked.
"I still got a lot to go through in court, but the FBI dudes are workin' with me. I just can’t let em’ take my girl from me," he lamented.
"It’s okay Thomas," Marie assured, placing her hand on top of his. "But, please tell me that you’re done with that life," she begged.
"Yeah," Thomas quietly affirmed. "I’m done."
Thomas changed the subject. "Hey, where’s our boy? You seen him today?"
"No." Marie curtly replied, followed by silence.
"Okay," Thomas hesitantly began. "Uh, is there somethin‘ wrong??"
"He’s not talking to me right now", Marie dismissively answered.
"What?? Why not?"
"Erin came to the bar a few weeks ago and I accidentally put my foot in it; it was an innocent slip," Marie looked to Thomas for sympathy.
"How bad?" Thomas pressed.
"It resulted in Erin seeing him out with Angela at a festival; it caused a little drama between them," Marie reluctantly admitted.
"Shit! I told you to stay far away from that shit or it would blow up Marie! He got a pretty dicey situation rollin' on there; he don't need us to get in the way. Plus., you know how jumpy he gets anyway," Thomas scolded.
"I know Thomas; it was an accident," Marie’s eyes glistened, deep despair was clearly audible in each passing word.
"Hey, hey; calm down. I’m sorry baby, it’s gonna be okay. Y’all are friends, you been friends too long for this not to pass," Thomas consoled. "He’s a stubborn ass but he’ll see what’s what and come round...You know that, right?" Thomas assured.
Marie didn't answer as Thomas stared confidently into her eyes. Noticing Thomas' aunt and Felicia walking back from the restroom, Marie finally nodded her head; "I hope you’re right," she answered, trying to hold back tears.
Across town, Erin and Chris sat on the porch after a late lunch.
"You okay Chris?" Erin seemed concerned by Chris’ uncharacteristic silence today. He’d seemed distant for several days actually.
"Yeah, I’m fine; just thinkin," Chris dismissed.
"Whatcha’ thinkin’ about?" She pried.
Chris measured his response before answering.
"I was just thinking about how fast things have been happening lately," Chris began. "I know you said we have to back up and look at the big picture, but it’s hard to do that when shit just keeps barreling toward me, you know?" He explained with a slight laugh of defeat.
"Then, you need to make time. Did you ever take any down time after your ex…after either of them actually?" Erin quizzed.
"Not really; it was hard," Chris justified.
"What was hard?" Erin pressed.
"I don’t know," Chris quipped, staring distantly ahead, searching for the right words. "I felt like...I felt that if I took too much time to examine the world, that it would pass me by. I figured that I’d lose any chance of working through things, everything really. The world keeps spinnin’ ya’ know?" Chris’ eyes conveyed a weary expression.
"How did that philosophy work out for ya’?" Erin knowingly smiled. Chris smiled back and shook his head, redirecting his eyes to the distance. He didn’t answer.
Erin studied Chris for a moment as he stared; she sensed that his mind was searching, that his thoughts ran deeper than he let on. She actually saw herself in him, the way she felt many months ago. Ultimately, Erin recognized the defeated daze.
Chris finally spoke. "You asked me about second chances one time; do you believe in them? Do you believe they really exist? I mean, given the right circumstances, do you believe things end up working out for people?"
"I believe that things work out for the best, yes, to answer your question," Erin assured. "It might not be the way we want and certainly not on our preferred time line but, yes, I believe," Erin answered.
"What if you could go back in time and change things?" Chris volleyed. "What would you do?"
"You don’t need some magical time machine, or divine intervention to magically appear from the sky," Erin began. "Plus, shit like that doesn't happen." Chris nervously shifted in his chair upon hearing Erin's opinion, wishing that he could tell her exactly how true her words were and at the same time how wrong she was...Beyond her wildest dreams actually.
"How bout’ you?" She pried. "The question is, do YOU believe in second chances?"
Chris thought for a moment. Memories rushed as far back back to the moment when he and Angela first met many years ago. To the moment when they began their slow drift apart, as if one were being swept to the shore and the other out to sea. The indecisiveness, the mistakes, the selfishness. The great divide. It all rushed back to his mind on the heels of Erin's query.
He thought about a tumultuous decline between he and Erin in the past. He remembered career decisions and the difficult consequences that ensued. Even though his intentions were just, he simply wasn’t fully prepared for the tough road that lay before him.
Love, laughter, pain, tears, missteps, triumphs, failures; A gambit of emotions rushed toward him like an unstoppable freight train. The good, the bad and the indifferent, laid out before his mind’s eye. Words from the distant and not so distant past echoed through his head as an inevitable day of self inventory had finally arrived.
"We need to take some time apart; I need some time if we’re able to find our way," Erin’s words resonated from the past.
"Tough decisions require full commitment; be prepared to back it up, be prepared for the consequences, even if your choices are for the right reasons. It’s gonna take some time to get your bearings in this career," his TV mentor’s wisdom swirled through his head.
"This is the way life is Chris; children are supposed to outlive their parents. It’s tacit in the law of human nature and it’ll take time, but it will get better with time," the counselor’s words rushed through his mind.
"Thomas, it’s gonna take time for some of these people to warm up to you. Keep your life straight and they’ll see you for who you are, don’t be impatient," Chris’ very own words of advice to Thomas rang loudly as his mind strolled through the past.
"I love him so much Chris," Marie cried after her boyfriend had been arrested for physical abuse. "How can I get over someone that I love so much, even after he did this? He can be better if he commits to changing himself...I know he can," a conversation that Chris had with Marie at the hospital over a year ago explicitly replayed in his head.
The second chance, Chris finally reasoned, might simply be time, and how we spend it. The past defines only a brief portion of our lives, a partially undeveloped snapshot. It’s what we do now and that which we do as we move forward. The learning curves which help to define our being is a second chance of sorts.
In reality, opportunities exist every day. Opportunity to move forward, to learn from the past and work for today is an ongoing cycle...an unfinished painting waiting to be framed.
No angels or divine intervention needed, only resolve to recognize and adjust.
Chris looked over to Erin with a warm smile. A visible expression of self realization crossed his face, as though a vacuum had snatched despair, regret and disappointment from his body. A moment of levity, so powerful in it’s simplicity.
"Yeah, I believe in second chances," he finally replied.
Erin looked away for a moment and then back to Chris. She sighed.
"You’re not over the past; there’s some loose ends aren't there?" Erin observed with a slight , deflective smile.
"No, I’m not Erin; I need some time. The time, oddly enough, that was asked of me many times when I selfishly ignored it," Chris admitted.
"Time to be unselfish, don’t ya’ think?" She suggested. "Your ex-girlfriend would appreciate that I suspect," she continued.
"Yeah, more than you could wildly imagine," Chris agreed.
Erin reached out to hold Chris' hand. "Chris, I really like you. I think you’re someone I could like a whole lot more, I really do. I don’t know, I feel like I’ve known you longer than I have but maybe our time isn’t right just yet. Who knows? Maybe you’ll end up with your ex after a while or maybe you and I will end up together. Maybe we should take a break for this to work," Erin reasoned.
Chris silently and intently listened. This time, he thought, her words didn’t resonate as sharply. He smiled, finally realizing exactly how clouded his mind must have been when he last heard those words pass through her lips. He saw a much bigger picture that had been obscured by a thick wall of despair which once separated him from a healthy life.
He stared to the distance, absorbing Erin's words. "In the meantime," she added, "we can be friends while you find yourself."
Chris laughed.
"What??" Erin asked, playfully punching Chris' arm.
"Nothing; I agree completely…I’ve been told that’s a good way to start," he answered.
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